5 Hacks For Airplane Travel From A Comedian

Here are some travel tips that can help you make your next trip a little more enjoyable.

1. You need noise-canceling headphones. Want to imagine you’re anywhere else except on an airplane with a screaming kid? Get noise-canceling headphones!

Listen to a podcast and imagine you’re not on a sky bus being jet propelled through the air. Look deep into the eyes of the child screaming “Dad. Dad. Dad” and just let him know you can’t hear him. Bose makes you the boss.

5 hacks for airplane travel
Bose headphones, because putting a muzzle on a screaming child is illegal and immoral.

2. Take out all your frustrations on airport employees, or maybe not. It’s the persons job to check everyone’s ID’s and boarding passes. They are not responsible for the plane being delayed.

These are the people you should make friends with. They have the power to get you on a different flight or upgrade your seat. Also being nice to people when you are frustrated will make you feel better, try it.

Excuse me, I'd like for you arrange another plane to pick me up. I'm very important.
Excuse me, I’d like for you to arrange another plane to pick me up. I’m very important.

3. I can never find the yoga studio at the airport. Not really a travel tip but I see a lot of people walking around in yoga pants / workout clothes, and I can never find the gym?

Now boarding downward dog.
Now boarding downward dog.

4. Bring a snack! Or you can pay $12 for some over salted cashews at the airport convenience store. You can get stuck waiting to take off on the runway and if you’re already been delayed a little, a snack goes a long way. A protein bar might even stop you from going low blood sugar postal.

bring snacks on airplane
Can you guess who brought snacks?

5. You’re allowed to bring your own booze. Well kind of, you can pack a bunch of child size liquor bottles into a zip lock bag.  Make sure each bottle meets the size requirements for liquids to bring onboard. Nobody is the wiser until you have a few too many and start telling everyone how much you love them.

fly with your own booze on a plane
This should help you get through those boring safety announcements.

Thanks for reading. I’m very fortunate to travel the world performing standup comedy. I enjoy making people laugh and being part of an event. If you need a comedian for a corporate event, fundraiser or Christmas party please get in touch.

Booking Information

To contact James for bookings:

Phone: (323) 570-HAHA

Special Services

Clean Corporate Comedy
Comedy Fundraiser
Christmas Party Comedy

Upcoming shows

No shows booked at the moment.


Featured video

Copyright 2003-2020 James Uloth